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Wow! This is one hell of a week. Things are on the decline once again and I'm back to observing the world and searching my soul's place in it. I'm single once again and back to my usual unlucky routines of finding romance. What amazes me is that I have never had an argument or fight of any kind with any girl I've ever dated, YET it is impossible for me to keep one. At the same time, I observe men all around me who abuse their women, cheat of them, treat them with inferiority, yet have their complete loyalty. What the hell is going on here?!
I've been told that I am a remarkably mature and intelligent person for my age (27 years). I'm a programmer of web applications. I can do my own taxes. I've been known to practice various forms of spiritual arts and philosophies. I've been all around the world. I enjoy music from a variety of cultures. I've sampled every major European and Asian language enough to recognize them when I hear them. With all of these experiences, this wisdom, and this knowledge, I have found one old truth can never truly be escaped. "Ignorance is bliss." Follow me on this point for a moment while I criticize the average man of my generation. If I acted against my normal nature and was immature and barely educated like the rest of the guys in my generation, I'd probably be more effectively popular. This, I imagine, is because the women of my generation are looking for exactly this sort of guy. Women of my generation are discouraged and maybe even a little repelled by men who are at least as intelligent, possibly even more intelligent, than they are themselves. Hence my seemingly endless troubles in finding a woman suited to my taste.
I know what you're thinking. "Why not try dating older women?" If I ever meet one that is nice, feminine, and not already married, then I probably would! I've observed women who wear wedding rings JUST to deceptively discourage potential suitors who wish to get to know them. Such nonsense. Such people who close their channels and forsake a chance meeting with someone special due to fear or negligence deserve to be alone.
Atop losing the girl I have been seeing, my household has been up in arms lately after a roaring argument between my mother and sister. My mother now wishes to move out, leaving my sister and I to deal with the finances, which we find is not entirely impossible. Quite frankly, I'd welcome having my mother live elsewhere as she has become far too dependant on others for survival. Not to mention, her general attitude and mannerisms are difficult to live with for long periods of time. Unfortunately, this whole clambake occurred days before my birthday (Aug 5) which has now passed with only a few birthday greetings here and there, my mother's NOT being one of them.
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